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T2P28 – Emotional Intelligence

Monday Motivation! That is what the Dr ordered me this morning as I overcame a hangover, concerts on Sunday are not my favourite thing, but at least I booked the morning off work in anticipation, some golden self-awareness and self-management right there. Last week TFL finance chief Simon Kilonback explained that without government funding we could see some reductions or potentially closures of some underground lines. Last week we were also given an update from the PM on the latest COVID variant Omicron, which appears to be very transmissible, with concerns growing on what this could mean for Christmas and more widely with restrictions on us again. Not the news I was hoping to see, and neither has the weather been this last week, it has been freezing and it’s even snowed in some parts of the UK, and I want no part of it in London. This cold might enforce an unofficial lockdown if it keeps up

Emotional intelligence (EI) at a high level refers to the capability of a person to manage and control their emotions and possess the ability to control the emotions of others as well. At a low level emotional intelligence is the combination of 4 components: Social Awareness, Self-Awareness, Relationship Management and Self-Management, all of which I’ve written in more detail this last month. Emotional Intelligence differs from IQ as IQ is only referring to our general intelligence, such as our comprehension and maths skills. Having a high IQ doesn’t mean you’ll have high EI, but they are both fundamental and should be worked on. In the Big Bang Theory, the character Sheldon has an incredibly high IQ but also incredibly low EI and this results in him lacking in the ability to ‘read the room.’ As I reflect on Wizkid’s concert yesterday through the lens of the 4 components of Emotional Intelligence; my social awareness took a dip as the Wray & Nephew kicked in dramatically. In usual circumstances, my self-management would steer me clear of that drink, and my self-awareness knows to rush drinks because it prevents me building relationships effectively when I get too drunk.

So I’ve been harping on about EI for a month now, but what makes it worth talking about. EI is integral to how we’re living, yet it remains something still considered secondary when we consider areas for our development. The value of increased EI is great personally and professionally, research indicates that it allows us not to be swayed by our emotions when making decisions. Managers that display high EI increase their teams performance through empowering them to be self-managing. When it comes to the ranking of EI, women rank higher than men, especially in self-awareness, Gillette produced a great advert touching on this below. Starting young, it’s essential for parents to support their children develop their EI alongside their IQ, too often has low EI in the form of bad behaviour been ignored or unchallenged with boys will be boys. Let’s ensure that children are supported in recognising and expressing their emotions, rather than brush it under that rug.

On ranking Emotional Intelligence, how would you rate yours?

It takes under 5 minutes and it gives a helpful and quick response into just how EI you are, give or take, mine was around 48. As part of inductions to work, organisations should incorporate something similar into their inductions. This will help them work with the person in arranging the best development plan for them. Even a similar vein, we have quizzes such as love languages which can help partners respond accordingly to the needs of their other halves.

Positive Psychology propose these 5 ways to improving EI:

  1. Identify the negative emotions

  2. Self-Evaluation

  3. Self-Expression

  4. Stress Management

  5. Empathy as a daily habit

Times are changing, what was deemed a role model man, father husband etc is not the same thing it was at the start of the 21st century. This is extended to leadership, the idea of what a good leader has also shifted. It for one is no longer viewed as male, but rather more appropriately the best person for the role. I’ve been on leadership courses and development programmes and the view of leadership is fluid and the best leaders should be equipped with high EI and actively look to enhance on it as it’ll ensure that they inspire and get the most out of their team. School might be done, but our learning continues forever, we’re our best investment. 2022 is round the corner, things will likely continue to change, so don’t get stuck with predated thinking, express yourself!

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